Fuck it, dude. Let’s go blogging (or Burger Queen-ing)
Well… That “hiatus” didn’t last very long at all, did it? That said, the breather was worth it – especially the four days I managed to go, cold turkey, without twitter. How I managed that I shall never know.
All sort of exciting stuff has been happening. I’m longer working for Yours Clothing, which, to be quite honest, was a major conflict of interest with the blog. So while I’m poor and can’t buy purdy clothes for the foreseeable, it’ll work out better in the long run. I hope?!
Anyway.
This year, the nearest I got to some sort of resolution was to “be more outrageous” in 2012. My 1st step towards this has been signing up to compete in Burger Queen 2012. Oh dear lord. Here’s the blurb:
Scottee welcomes you back for a super sized second helping of his infamous beauty pageant Burger Queen! Every Thursday in March, he will be whittling down a wide range of fantastic fatties in his unique game show for fat people. Each chunky contestant will endure three rounds designed to find the perfect chub to be crowned Burger Queen 2012. Rounds include trend (flaunting your fat fashion), taste (your signature dish served to our judges) and talent (light entertainment for heavyweights).
Each heat is judged by some wonderful faces including Nick Grimshaw, Paloma Faith, Cock N Bull Kid, Alison Hammond, Immodesty Blaize, Sue Tilley, Princess Julia, BQ ’11 winner Nina Neon, not to mention Scottee’s Mum and our resident judge & plus size princess Amy Lamé.
The winner will receive £100 cash, £400 worth of gifts from our sponsors, a bottle of plonk, the coveted Burger Queen medal, the golden unhappy meal and the chance to perform at the Roundhouse CircusFest in ‘Camp’!
More? Over the course of the contest Scottee will also be putting himself through the murky world of fad diets, celebrity fitness DVD’s and some alternative exercise classes – NHS’ answer to Fanny Craddock, Dr Tim Crocker-Buque will be keeping an eye on him and vlogging his progress!
Other highlights include guest performances from chubby chasers Myra Dubois, Timberlina, Russella &Tenor Ladies, Sami Knight is on the decks playing big (gastric) band tunes, the amazing ‘What’s Jude eating this week?’ is back, the weekly Pie Chart Rundown and of course ‘the show’s not over till the Miss Annabel Sings
Heat 2 – 8th March
Heat 3 – 15th March
Heat 4 – 22nd March
Grand Final – 29th March7pm (8pm Show)
Tickets are available on the door but advance booking is advised.Royal Vauxhall Tavern
372 Kennington Lane, Vauxhall SE11£7 or £11.99 with the RVT Burger & Chips
(Meat or Vege options available).More info and advance tickets from http://burger-queen.info
The search to find the perfect porker has begun – who will become Burger Queen?
It is a big, fat, celebration of all things fat and outrageous, and I just can’t WAIT! Although, I am slightly terrified.
As well as myself, Charlotte Cooper of Obesity Timebomb is competing this Thursday and will be awesome. Heat one featured the sexual siren that is Bethany from My Arched Eyebrow – and she won! The final takes place on Thursday March 29th, so do come along to help me cheer her on!
As for me, my heat is next Thursday, March 15th. If you’d like to come along you can order tickets here – I’d LOVE to see you (and need all the emotional support I can get, haha!)
Stay tuned for an interview with Head Fatso, Scottee, himself!
